Separated at Birth
May 7, 2010 by Kathy McManus
The case of a severely disabled mother suing for the right to visit her three-year-old triplets "raises questions both legal and profoundly human," reports The Los Angeles Times — including "What is a parent?" and is the woman "still a mom?"
34-year-old Abbie Dorn has been paralyzed and unable to speak since a "botched" procedure during childbirth sent her into cardiac arrest and deprived her brain of oxygen. She is now divorced from her husband, Dan Dorn, who has full custody of the triplets.
Abbie Dorn has held her children only once — the day they were born — and hasn't been allowed to see them for almost two and a half years. Her parents, with whom she now lives, have gone to court on her behalf, The Times reports, asking a judge "to order Dan to let Abbie see her children. Dan has refused all requests, arguing that visitation would be too traumatic at their young age."
Dan Dorn's lawyer says that the triplets would feel "terribly guilty" seeing their mother — incontinent and dependent on a feeding tube — knowing that "their childbirth" was responsible for her condition. Abbie Dorn's lawyer says her client has a constitutional right to parent. "The children need to have a relationship with their mother," the lawyer says. "The kids need to know the truth."
You be the judge: what's the most ethical way to solve this case?
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27 Comments
What do you think? Leave a comment
May 7, 2010 by Starr Whitney
i think u should let the kids see there mother under supervision and see how it goes if it goes fine then thats good and if not then take the visitations away its as simple as that
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May 17, 2010 by alivia
hope find them
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July 18, 2010 by Carol
Are you kidding me?? The children and the Mother has every right to know each other. Just because she has disabilities don't mean she can't love and adore her children. It is appauling that the father has got away with this so far. I pray for that mom to be able to see her children. Her parents can help and supervise the visits and the children will love her and the grandparents, the younger they are exposed the better. They are NOTprejustice yet unless their father has put it into them!! Nan..
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August 16, 2010 by carol deleo
iI believe you should let her see them, but if it does go badly then don't strip the mother of her rights just make it known give the children sometime to get it what had happened and the husband to divorce his wife that is just selfish on his part. I have cancer my husbands family told him to leave me and divorce me and take my kids but we are still together and with the love he should me I fought to survive and they only gave me 3 to 6 months and I am still here after 2 years and we have been together 16 years
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October 12, 2011 by alice ford
The mother carried those children, gave birth to those children and has no control over what happened during child birth. She may be disabled but yes she should have every right to her children and as far as I am concerned there was nothing just about keeping those kids from their mom! Just because the dad didnt want to be with the mother he found it more convenient to use that as an excuse and the courts leet him! I hope and pray that who ever did this tho her and those kids PAY and they will one day or another that will come back to them. I think the court didnt consider the fact that that was a loving and caring mother and those children would have loved and respected her especially with what she went through to have them. What is the dad doing by the way? My guess he went right on with his happy little life and found a mommy for those kids that he probably just liked a little better. It's a shame what the judicial system is doing and what parents are doing to their kids!
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May 7, 2010 by Maria
It just sounds like the father doesn't want to let the kids see their mother because he can't handle it as a father. It shouldn't be traumatic for the kids because "their childbirth" was responsible for her condition because the kids should never be made to feel that they are at fault for that. Assuming the father's man enough to explain this to his children, it shouldn't be a hindrance; seeing their mother is more important. Kids are small, growing adults, nothing less.
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October 25, 2010 by john
That is completley wrong. i mean come on. the dad must be nuts im still wondering why they have'nt sued him .she is the very person that brought them in the world. i dont care if there in china the mother them whether it goes wrong or not.
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December 9, 2011 by Marsha BR
Problem is, he's not much of a man. Maybe not much of a father either with his attitude toward his ex wife.
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May 7, 2010 by Lucy
It appears that the father has issues of guilt stemming from the fact that he divorced this woman after she gave birth to his children and became severly disabled.
A two and a half year old can understand that someone is "sick," and does not have the capability to feel guilt. Compassion, yes. Meeting their mother would enhance their lives.
Just my two cents.
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May 7, 2010 by Evie
It's mother day weekend, I hope by some miracle; those children see the person who got them here.
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May 12, 2010 by Vix
This is not the whole story, I believe the mother is in a very nearly vegetative state and is not capable of communicating with anyone...
How is it that she is requesting the right to see her children?
Without knowing the full story it is irresponsible to comment on who is or is not being responsible here.
In my opinion…
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May 15, 2010 by DEBRA GRIFFIN
the mother is being deprived of her rights and so are those children. How could someone even think about doing such a thing? The father will be sorry when the children are old enough to know the truth of this horible thing.
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May 15, 2010 by Sonia
Shame on the father. Could we understand that he wishes to protect the children? yes, undeniably so, but from their own mother, absolutely not in this specific case. This is an outrage! He is lucky he is not being sued for alienation of affections on behalf of the children to their mother. What happened to this woman medically was not her fault. Based on the content of the article the father is making a judgement based soley on the mothers health condition. It also seems that perhaps he has some short comings in his ability to "handle" her medical condotion. This womans ability to love or capacity to is something he has no right to keep from her.
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May 21, 2010 by Claudia
The woman has rights and they are her children. She has done nothing wrong and should be allowed to see her children. People should not be penalized because of horrific medical issues. The father is fortunate that that he is not affected by child birth and his health was never put at risk. NO person should EVER be denied their rights because of medical issues or any type handicap. He should be ashamed of himself for abandoning his family and denying his children to see and know their mother and denying a mother from seeing and knowing her own children. She’s not murderer she is disabled. Shame, shame, shame…
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May 22, 2010 by Melissa Anderson
I am a forty-three year old mother a two (son, Matthew is nine and Kaitln is 7. My ex-husband, Les filed a motion to end my parental rights because he and his lawyer have diagnosef me with a physical and mental impairment due to my medical condition Parkinson's Disease. It's a travesty and injustice to both me and my kids and they are going to hate their dad for this when they are old enough to understand what their dad did to us. I am so angry that this would even be considered by anyone as I am fully capable of caring for my kids safely at this point and regardlessn, a mother is always her child's parent and should never, ever by made to sign that right away. It's ludicrous!!!!!!! How would he like a dose of his own medicine?
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June 8, 2010 by John
the is no way that the father should be allowed to keep the mother away from her children it sounds like another case of someone totally wrongly treating a disabled person is disgraceful the disabled are by far having more problems than all others combined including our goverment at all levels
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June 14, 2010 by Aldonnia Mcfadden
I think that those babies need to spent time with there Mother happier for her those babies would not been in this world.
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July 13, 2010 by L LOVELY LOPEZ
i think she should be able 2 see her children,they need 2 know how they came 2 this world & who brought them,as a mother myself,it's hurting my heart,i myself can't live without my children they gone for a day or night i'm so lost,it's a bond that will never be broken ....have a lovely day...xoxoxo
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